There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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