i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
