It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
