People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
