i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize