Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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