You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
