There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
