Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
false alarm, still single
Randomize
