I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
