I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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