And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
