so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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