sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
