nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize
