I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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