It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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