I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
