My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Randomize
