Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
