We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
God, I missed his penis.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize