It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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