just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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