Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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