Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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