I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
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