Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
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