He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
You ate ashes out of my bong
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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