What a fucking waste of an outfit
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
