you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
