The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I hate all girls vehemently.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Randomize
