3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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