i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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