Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
