i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
