So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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