operation harelip BJ is a go
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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