I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
pray to the hookup gods
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
