One girl and one boy is just not enough.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
