Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
