How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
