walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
