Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
