I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Randomize
