okay pat passed out under dana's car
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
