I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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