he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize
