Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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