the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
