I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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