so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
he thought i was a dude.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize